Structural Resonance Alignment - Control in Relationships

Structural Resonance Alignment Interview from the Desteni Farm: http://desteni.co.za/forum/viewtopic.php?f=290&t=16455


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cq_clYfjg6Q

1 - Control in relationships

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZMRAkDwFhTQ

2 - Control in relationships

Ok, this is Jorn’s Resonances and … we start with why we’re doing this interview is we’ve seen a Physical ‘play-out’ that’s Currently busy Manifesting in your and Marlen’s Agreement uhm… that is at the moment still ‘Unconscious’, but it’s Manifesting in your ‘Physical Movement’ interestingly enough with each other.
The ‘Physical Movement’ that’s ‘interplaying’ between the two of you is that you’re still Allowing yourself to ‘stand-back’ in a form of uhm… a reserved ‘retreat’ and Marlen is ‘tiptoeing’ around that application of you –in other words, she’ll be kind of moving ‘around’-you Physically ‘very fast’ in a form of anxiety, because she doesn’t yet know how-to ‘place’ your Current Manifestation of Yourself within Yourself - meaning she doesn’t yet know ‘how’-to Direct-it within ‘her world’ because she hasn’t particularly ‘faced’ such a point before - she isn’t even yet Consciously ‘aware’ of-it - this whole ‘play-out’ – it’s ‘Physically’-happening within both of your Movements.
So for example, let’s say that Marlen would be here, your approach in terms of how you are standing is still like this: kind of ‘backwards’ uhm, ‘reserved’ / ‘retreat’. It’s not yet a Full ‘Equal and One’ ‘Acceptance’ and ‘Embracing’ of yourself with her, does that make sense?
Jorn: Yeah, it does
So we have to look-at ‘what’…’where’, because in ‘why’ and ‘how this Manifest ‘inside’-you in terms-of How it’s looking ‘Physically’, is that you are ‘underlyingly’ ‘here’- that if here’s your body, your legs, arms, ‘underlyingly’ here you are Participating with-her – meaning in terms-of certain ‘points’, the ‘Platform’ that we’ve discussed in the previous agreements, I mean that’s pretty cool that you guys have, you know that ‘Platform’ is there. But now, that ‘Platform’ is still a ‘Structured-System’ that both of you are living in terms-of your ‘Equal and One’ Support within your Agreement – meaning when the points come-up, you’ll discuss it, you’ll look at it , you’ll open it up – that ‘Support’-point established quite well in the ‘Platform’- but now we’re looking-at ‘Physical’ ‘Equal and One’ ‘Participation’ wherein, in ‘Living’ this point, your Experience of yourself and with her will be much more surprisingly unexpectedly ‘fun’, wherein you’ll have Moments of spontaneity, that you hadn’t experienced before –
So ‘underlyingly’ you are still participating with her - from the perspective I’ve explained now - yet here within your Mind, there’s another ‘Reality’ within-which you’re still Accepting and Allowing Yourself to ‘Participate’, it’s ‘Influencing’ your Agreement that’s ‘Here’ in the ‘Physical’ –
So ‘where’ and ‘what’ is Currently ‘Preoccupying’-you within your Mind that is Not-coming to a point-of ‘Solution’ in terms-of ‘Stopping’ that’s currently ‘Possessing’-you uhm… ‘more’ than your Participation within your Agreement with Marlen - what’s been happening?
Jorn: yeah, well it’s interesting because we discussed the point about my finger being hurt and I traced back basically ‘what’ was going on within my ‘Thinking process’, and I traced it back to where I am for example busy with the SRA video’s at of moment which is a lot of processing, and there was a point where something wasn’t working ‘as I expected’ so something ‘unexpected’ happened and stuff deleted, I had to do it again and I created like a ‘victimized state’ – I said like ‘Ok what’s happening ‘to me’? – you know I created like this ‘resistance’ or this ‘energy’ at that moment. And what happened in-there is I get basically ‘preoccupied’ with like a ‘charge’ of ‘Ok, something is ‘against me’- so to speak, uhm and that gets then/ is then ‘preoccupying’-me basically in everything I do - whether it is dishwashing or anything basically.
Resonances: Ok, so you’re still allowing ‘Points’ to ‘Control’-you in which You-‘Feel’ you have No-‘Control’ over
Jorn: yeah exactly, I played a ‘victim’- which I saw that I ‘played that out’ when I looked/ I traced it back and, that created a point where I would ‘get it done’- because I was working with a ‘resistance’ which eventually led to like a Physical ‘Interruption’-of: ok ‘End’
Resonances: and to that you reacted quite extensively
Jorn: right, well… Initially I didn’t, I wasn’t like ‘concerned’ about it but I realized like ‘Ok this is really a Point where I, where there is like really a ‘Stop’ like a ‘break-point’ of a Pattern that I’m ‘playing-out’ – so I realized like ‘Ok, I’m having this ‘Idea’ in my head or an ‘Energy’-created-‘Idea’, something that I’m ‘resisting’ and that ‘plays-out’ and that was very clear for me
Resonances: Ok, so - if you have a look at that point that ‘triggered’ the reaction that you experienced that took you into a point of ‘Possession’ within your Mind [Jorn: jah] what this is ‘showing’ from your Total ‘Beingness’ perspective is that you still want-to be ‘In-Control’ of your Reality at all-times [Jorn: yeah] and if there’s a point where you’re Not ‘In-Control’ of-it, you’ll go into ‘Reaction’, to almost like a ‘Possessive-Reaction’ inside yourself [Jorn: yeah] wherein you’ll ‘fight’ with that-‘point’ [Jorn: yeah] to, through ‘fighting’ ‘Control’-it so that you can through being able to ‘Control’-it, Manifest-it into your ‘Reality of Control’, wherein ‘I’ve got ‘Control’ of it’ – it’s almost like a ‘free-horse’ that’s running and you’re ‘roping’-it to ‘control’-it [Jorn: yeah]- that form of ‘approach’ you’re taking with points that you ‘feel’ that you have ‘Control’-over.
Jorn: yeah
Now we’ve gotta look-at like the ‘free-horse’ example, you’d have to look at ‘Freedom of Expression’ and ‘Living’
Jorn: yeah, for example one…
Resonances: ‘This’, this you haven’t Allowed Yourself to Actually ‘do’ and that’s why your ‘Physical Participation’ with Marlen is Not Complete-‘Unconditional’, you’re still within your Mind ‘Observing’-it ‘As’ an Agreement uhm…but Not-‘Participating’ ‘within’-it. So your ‘status’ within the Agreement is still as ‘Observer’, because you’ve got the ‘Agreement’ in ‘Application’ as a ‘System’ inside your Mind – meaning your ‘approach’ towards the ‘Agreement’ is still ‘Systematic’, the ‘Assistance and Support Application’ -because it’s an ‘Application’ that’s ‘Systematic’ - you’re Not Actually ‘Living’ as a ‘Participant’ within the Agreement. That’s ‘why’ you’ll tend-to for example, go-‘into’ your Mind more uhm…because your ‘Reality’ is Currently ‘Existing’ as an ‘Observer’ – I mean, the ‘Mind-Reality’ is As ‘Observer’, therefore you’ll not be ‘in’ and ‘with’ and ‘as’ your Physical-Body ‘Here’ in the ‘Physical’ Participating ‘Equal and One’
Jorn: right
See Marlen at the moment in terms of her Expression is: she’s ‘Physical’, she’s ‘Here’ [Jorn: yeah] uhm…she’s had… she’s Applied that point of discipline of Actually ‘Stopping the Thoughts’ – meaning Not…Moving from ‘Observer’ to ‘Participant’ [Jorn: yeah] – whereas you’re still at the moment in Constant ‘Observer’-status, because of the ‘Point’-of ‘Control’ [Jorn: right] –You still ‘want’ to-be in ‘Control’ of Everything and Everyone in your ‘Reality’.
Jorn: yeah well this is like one point where this turns-out, like specifically that I can see in this event and this Consequence that ‘plays-out’, so I see that and then I realized like ‘Hey this is a Pattern that I’m playing-out’
Resonances: but let’s have a look at the ‘Pattern’ so that you can ‘Identify’ in terms-of Actually Practically working with-it for yourself - meaning to ‘move’-out of ‘Observer’ into ‘Physical-Reality’ as ‘Participant’ [Jorn: yeah] uhm… remember I’m using Marlen as an example, because at the moment in terms-of your ‘Reality’, you can’t yet-‘See’ what ‘Physical-Participation’ is, because you’ve never experienced-it before.
So, what happens in terms-of ‘Existing’ as an ‘Observer’ within your Reality is that you’ll, more ‘tend’-to go into ‘seclusion’, ‘Self-Seclusion’ – because what does a ‘Controller’ do? It stands in a point of ‘Dominance’, ‘Power’, like a ‘King’ – which in-that ‘aspect’ manifests an ‘Aloneness’ which goes ‘with’-it ‘automatically’ because you have to stand in a ‘point’-of ‘Perceived-Responsibility’ of your Reality, but that ‘Perceived-Responsibility’ of yourself in your Reality, you’ve defined as a ‘King’ in-‘Essence’ that must stand ‘alone’, must have a ‘dominant stance’, because it has a point-of ‘within’-that a ‘King’s definition is being that-of ‘Power’ – therefore, you’ll go into: ‘seclusion’, because if you look-at a ‘King’ that’s portrayed within movies and things like that, they’re always existing-‘as’ you’re currently existing within your reality
Jorn: yeah, so this ‘seclusion’ is that ‘retreat’ or ‘stepping-back’, referring to that point
Resonances: yes, where you’re not… that’s an ‘outflow’/ ‘Consequential outflow’-point of uhm…the ‘retreat’ and the ‘reservation’, the ‘retreat’ and ‘reservation’-point is coming as a Manifested Physical ‘out-play’ of You Accepting and Allowing this point-of ‘Control’ instead-of ‘Living’ uhm… at the same-time, there’s still ‘parts’ of-you that ‘you’ want the ‘control’-of, that you don’t wanna ‘let go’ inside your mind - meaning, there’s still ‘secret chambers’ that’s existing ‘in your head’ that you don’t wanna ‘let go’-of, that you want the ‘control’-over, because you’ve defined-it within the definition ‘of’ and ‘as’ ‘You’ as a ‘Controller’ uhm… within your world and your reality
Jorn: yeah, I can see those points clearly, I mean there are certain things that I ‘hold-onto’ as a definition which I’m not always like ‘conscious’-of but I realize in the way that I ‘react’ to ‘certain things’ that I do have points that I’ve ‘defined’ myself-as.
Resonances: But remember, you’re still only looking at ‘negative’, there’s also ‘positive’-polarity to ‘secret chambers’ within your Mind so to speak – So you have to look-at for example ‘where’ in your head is still for example ‘play’ in terms-of uhm…fantasizing about ‘different life’, ‘different worlds’, ‘people’…you know when you go ‘in your head’ and ‘play-out’ ‘scenes’ and things like-that uhm, that Application is still a ‘Holographic Imagery Projection’ in-which beings go ‘into’ to ‘Escape Reality’ for a moment, wherein ‘that’ is seen as a form-of ‘Enjoyment’ or ‘Pleasure’ instead-of Realizing the…or ‘Becoming’ the ‘Expression’ of ‘Living’ wherein ‘Pleasure’ and ‘Enjoyment’ becomes a point-of…or ‘manifests’ through-‘Sharing-Self’- which is a Completely different experience.

So, you’ll have to look-at ‘where’ and ‘how’ and with-‘what’ within your Mind you’re still Allowing Yourself to ‘Participate’ in ‘play-outs’ in relation-to ‘both’ ‘Positive’ and ‘Negative’ aspects, because remember in terms-of ‘Walking the Process’… in terms of ‘Stopping the Mind’, you’ve gotta look-at both ‘Negative’ and ‘Positive’, because the Mind exists ‘in’ and ‘as’ both-Polarities {Jorn: hmm] doesn’t help, you only stop the ‘Negative’ in terms-of only looking at ‘reactions’ you-have, you have to also look-at your ‘Pleasure’-points or ‘Enjoyment’-points where you Accept and Allow yourself to-go ‘into’ within your Mind [Jorn: yeah] – meaning ‘Pleasure’ and ‘Enjoyment’ that’s defined according-to ‘Imagery’ and ‘Pictures’ and ‘play-outs’ that can be simple things, Jorn, you’ve gotta-be ‘specific’ with those points uhm... in terms-of seeing ‘where’ your Mind or ‘where’ you-go ‘into’ your Mind in both ‘positive’ and ‘negative’ aspects, does that make sense?
Jorn: yeah, it does make sense
Resonances: Because if you only work on the ‘negative’ you are still feeding the ‘positive’, and therefore in-‘Essence’ Justifying ‘still’ remaining-‘defined’ within and as the Mind, but you’re using that Justification through-saying like for example: ‘Oh, I’m working on my Process , I’m Stopping my Thoughts, my Reactions’ - but yet, ‘secretly’ there is still ‘points’ that you Accept and Allow-yourself to go ‘into’ within your Mind that’s ‘Pleasure’ or ‘Enjoyment’-based, does that makes sense?
Jorn: right, I see what you mean
Resonances: many beings ‘miss’ that – it’s fine details, it could be a ‘fleeting’ moment, ‘daydreaming’, of various-things - gotta be ‘aware’ of that, because that’s become so…or such a ‘Natural’-thing to do for people that they don’t ‘Realize’ the Actual Consequential ‘Effect’ it has on ‘their-Living’ within Actual Reality, because then you…then that point of…let’s say for example, there is a ‘Pleasure’ or ‘Enjoyment’-point within your Mind that you quite…that you ‘often’ ‘visit’ uhm... then what happens is that ‘Pleasure’ or ‘Enjoyment’ Completely ‘Posses’-you and then you don’t ‘Live’ in ‘Actual Reality’ and then you miss the…what ‘Self-Enjoyment’ and ‘Self-Pleasure’ is within ‘Participating’ with someone in ‘Expression’ within ‘Living in the Physical’.
So you have to see ‘where’ you’ve ‘Created’ such points within your Mind both ‘positive’ and ‘negative’.
Jorn: yeah, I had arrived at that point where I realized like ‘Ok, I have to see where this happens, because I realized like ‘ok there’s this ‘Pattern’ that I’m still ‘playing-out’
Resonances: yeah where your Mind’s still ‘Possessing’-you in you in both ‘positive’ and ‘negative’ aspects
Jorn: Yeah
Resonances: so you are ‘Participating’ in a ‘Mind-Reality’ instead-of in Actual ‘Physical-Reality’. Then what happens is you ‘through’ your ‘Mind-Reality’ become an ‘Observer’ of the ‘Actual Reality’ instead of a ‘Participant’ - then you’ll ‘use’ the ‘Actual-Reality’ to ‘feed’-your ‘Mind-Reality’
Jorn: yeah, I see this mechanism, I’ve seen what… where I’ve done this or ‘points’ that still, that it ‘happens’ basically even-though you can at some point not be ‘bothered’ by-it, but when it comes back then you know like ‘Ok, it’s still there’
Resonances: yeah, no, you’ve gotta really ‘Physically’, ‘Practically’ move-through these ‘points’ –
So Jorn, what I suggest is in terms-of ‘Solution’-wise you gotta ‘push’-yourself to ‘Participate’-in ‘Physical Actual Reality’ with Beings, uhm… you’ve gotta ‘balance-out’ your day in terms-of sitting in front of the computer and being-out in the ‘Physical Reality’ – because uhm…at the moment your computer is another ‘Escapism’-point that you’re ‘using’ to be able-to ‘Experience’ this ‘point’-of ‘Self-Seclusion’ that’s Manifesting due-to your ‘stance’ within wanting to ‘Control’ your Reality, within the ‘Definition’ of-you in-‘Essence’ being a ‘King’ from your definition ‘originating’ from your ‘Definition’ / your ‘Idea’ of ‘Responsibility’ - ‘Self-Responsibility’ comes … or what ‘Self-Responsibility’ means is that you take ‘Responsibility’ for ‘Who you are’- you start with ‘yourself’ within ‘who you are’ first, then from there, you start ‘Directing’ your Reality. Then whatever ‘happens’ in your reality won’t ‘bring-up’ a ‘Reaction’ -what will Immediately come-up is ‘How do I Direct this ‘Point’ to an ‘Effective Solution’, makes sense?
Jorn: yeah, I see that definitely
Resonances: So I suggest, ‘balance-out’ your day, see if you can ‘Participate’ more… in terms of like working-out in the Farm, in Nature, just ‘Communicating’- does that make sense?
[Jorn: uh huh]
Resonances: because otherwise, your ‘Mind-Reality’ will ‘take-over’ in terms of ‘Full-Possession’ wherein you’ll ‘completely’ ‘lock’-yourself out-of ‘Actual Reality’ - and then, it becomes even more tough to get-out of that one, like really tough – because then you’ve gotta ‘break-down’ ‘everything’ that’s Manifested within-you, then you’ve got to literally ‘Start’ completely all-over-again from a ‘blank slate’ - and that usually ‘happens’-through… wherein your whole ‘Outer-Reality’ comes like… ‘falls apart’, because you’ve ‘linked’ your ‘Outer-Reality’ to your ‘Mind-Reality’. If your ‘Outer-Reality’ ‘falls apart’, your ‘Inner-Reality’ will ‘fall apart’ – meaning the ‘Mind Reality’, does that make sense?
Jorn: yeah I see
Resonances: So instead of having-to go to ‘that point’, ‘balance-out’ your World. Work in front of the computer for a certain amount of time and make sure you Participate in ‘Actual Reality’ for amount of time uhm…with Marlen remember ‘touch’, remember ‘communication’- even just ‘sitting’ with her or ‘lying-down’ with her for a moment, you know just ‘Being Physical’ in various-ways is already ‘coming-out’ of that point of ‘Mind-Reality-Seclusion’. You do it through ‘Physically’ pushing-yourself to ‘Physically-Participate’, because that will already ‘alter’ your ‘Mind-State’ from ‘Observer’ to ‘Participant’
Jorn: Yeah, I see what you mean
Resonance: and be aware of your ‘touch’ always uhm…because then you’ll know…then you’re already ‘shifting’-out of ‘Mind-Reality’ to ‘Participating’ in the ‘Actual Reality’
Jorn: Yeah, what I recognize is uhm…that within working with programs and software and computer… like that computer-thing that I’m now doing and this whole ‘King’ thing and ‘Dominance’ and all those words come-in when working with a program and trying to ‘control’ all those things that I’m working-with and then, creating basically this ‘Mind’-thing that I am carrying on my head basically
Resonances: Yeah, it’s like a throne…
Jorn: yeah so…
Resonances: I don’t see a problem ‘there’ particularly in terms-of your Application with Programming and things like that – meaning, you’re quite ‘good’ with-it, you’re quite ‘stable’ in-it
Jorn: yeah, but what I meant with this is in that process of like ‘learning’-it and all that I created that ‘resistance’-point of, you know like ‘fighting’-something and there, this ‘energy’ started developing and that’s what I see very clearly
Resonances: where the Point-of ‘Control’ is again coming-out
Jorn: and that became like…that escalated…
Resonances: then it became a Point of ‘Possession’: ‘I ‘Must’ fucking ‘Control’ this now and then that point ‘Possesses’-you and you ‘forget’-about everything-else, and then you become so ‘Focused’ on only this ‘one point’ and then ‘takes you over’
Jorn: yeah
Resonances: careful of that
Jorn: yeah well that’s what I clearly see that happened actually so…
Resonances: So now How to Correct-it:
‘Equalize your day’: so-much-time in front of the computer /so-much-time in your ‘Physical Reality’ why? So that you can Create your ‘Physical-Reality’ ‘Platform’, so that you Remember: ‘The Physical’ Jorn: yeah, ‘balance-it-out’, balance-it-out with ‘Physical’.
Resonances: So when you sit in front of your computer, you ‘Access’ that point because it takes a, it takes focus, it takes concentration uhm…wherein you’re ‘homed’ onto this ‘one’-point constantly, but to make sure it doesn’t become a point of ‘Possession’- you ‘Extract’-yourself from that ‘Momentary’-Reality for a moment, ‘Participate’ = ‘Physical-Reality’
Jorn: yeah, it’s like taking ‘brakes’, like ‘stopping’-it and really-‘stopping’ and then doing something ‘Physical’ and returning here
Resonances: yeah, because then what you’ll find will happen is once the ‘Equilibrium’ is ‘set’, your ‘Participation’ within the programming will be ‘Here’, your ‘Whole-Reality’ within-which you ‘move’ will be ‘Here-Physically’- it won’t be ‘Separate’-realities in within-which…what you are currently busy-doing is: this has become a ‘Separate-Reality’ and the ‘Physical’ is becoming a ‘Separate-Reality’
Jorn: yeah
Resonances: there doesn’t-‘exist’ ‘Two’ ‘Separate-Realities’, you are ‘Here in the Physical’= One Reality, this is where you wanna be, your Mind is again ‘Separating’-you from ‘Actual Reality’
Jorn: yeah
Resonances: So you wanna ‘stabilize’-you within the ‘Physical-Reality’, this you do by ‘Equalizing’ your ‘Participation’
Jorn: yeah, I can definitely ‘see’ that I ‘disappeared’ and ‘digitized’ and basically ‘digitized’-myself completely - it’s very clear within How I ‘absorbed’-completely into…like ‘disappeared’-almost, ‘vanished’-basically – I can definitely see that
Resonances: So, it’s… I’m busy ‘Manifesting’-now in terms-of being… the ‘outflow’ is being ‘problematic’ in terms-of this ‘play-out’, so instead-of it having to ‘go’-there, you can Apply Yourself into ‘Correction’ through being-aware of the ‘Physical Reality’ and taking…and ‘Participating’-with…then you’ll Start-‘Living ‘– which is Completely-‘Different’ to what you are Currently ‘Existing’-within now
Jorn: jah, definitely because previously I was doing more ‘Physical’-stuff uhm… and that like actually Supported… was actually Supporting Myself
Resonances: yeah, I could see you were a lot more ‘closer’ with Marlen as well during that stage and now you’re kind-of ‘moving away’
Jorn, yeah and I recognize that ‘Pattern’ because it happened…it’s like something that I see from the ‘past’ as something I’ve done before, like a certain-‘way’ of doing-things in a kind of ‘Self-Destructive’ way, so to speak
Resonances: ok, so it’s a ‘habit’ of becoming ‘Possessed’ by a point
Jorn: Yeah
Resonances: Instead of ‘Directing’-you ‘As’ the Point
Jorn: Definitely
Resonances: Ok so you’ve got that ‘flag’-point for yourself
Jorn: Yeah
Resonances: to Not-become ‘Possessed’- if you feel you’re spending ‘too much time’ on a point, you know: ‘Jorn, be careful here, I’m going into my mind, I’m sitting in this one-place all this time: problem, get out’
Jorn: yeah
Resonances: Stop, ‘Participate’ in ‘Physical Reality’- you actually wanna Stop-.Yourself ‘before’ you go-into that point of ‘Possession’- that you do through is just breathing ‘I’m Here in my Physical Reality, I Participate, ‘make coffee’, ‘talk to people’, ‘work’ uhm... and then when you sit in front of a computer it doesn’t become a point of ‘Possession’, it becomes a point-of ‘Participation’- then everything you do in your ‘Reality’ becomes ‘Equal and One’, why? Because I’m Here
Jorn: hmm hmm
Resonances: makes sense?
Jorn: Clear, Yeah
Resonances: Ok, so just maybe listen to-it again, maybe write down all the points individually that we’ve discussed because I’ve just discussed a ‘whole’-lot of points to consider or ‘flag-point’, but the primary point is, what I suggest you do is, with Marlen, is difusing the ‘Control’-point through Muscle Communication, the ‘Control’-point uhm… ‘Possession’-point, the ‘King’-definition uhm.. and then working-through all these words that we’ve written: ‘Self-Seclusion’, ‘Dominance’, ‘Power’, ‘Aloneness’, ‘Responsibility’, ‘Freedom of Expression’, ‘Living’, ‘Observer’, ‘Participant’ uhm…’positive’, ‘negative’ - I’ve written all the words here so I suggest you… have a look at it
Jorn: yeah if I can take your notes, we’ll use that in an SRA session
Resonance: ‘reacting’ very quickly when a point is not…that whole-‘Design’ where you ‘react’ towards a point that you want-to ‘Control’, instead of it being a ‘Self-Directive’ Application to a Solution – that’s ‘Participation’. ‘Observer’ is: observing the point ‘there’, wanting to ‘Control’-it ‘there’ through making-it part of your ‘Mind-Reality’ as your Current ‘Stance’ within and as ‘Control’
Jorn: yeah, my experience in terms-of this point is it went-on and then turned-out into a Manifested Events, Physical Events that actually like ‘signaled’-me like: ok, it’s time to ‘Stop’ and then actually something-‘happens’ that I realize like: ‘Ok, it’s a fuck-up’
So, I realized like ‘Ok, I’m doing something that is like ‘forceful’ and that is Not ‘me’ and that is Not ‘what I want’’ so, I realized that point when all those events started like ‘compounding’ like in a very short-period, in a ‘domino-effect’ coming down
Resonances: The ‘Physical’ kind of said to you: ‘Hello, where are you?’
Jorn: yeah, definitely experienced that so…and besides that point of ‘this’, I also had like that same night, I had like these dreams about the video-programming stuff that I did, and I had this very strong cramp in my left calve
Resonances: yeah, Judgments, ‘Control’, it’s a ‘Control’-point
Jorn: very nasty stuff so, I was basically done after that with the whole-shit
Resonances: So now you ‘understand’ and see-‘why’. So I suggest use your Muscle Communication with Marlen, maybe have her also listen to the interview I suggest
Jorn: yeah
Resonances: uhm…so that she can, just for her to understand uhm…’where you’re-at’ within ‘your world’ uhm…because at the moment ‘Unconsciously’ she doesn’t yet-know ‘where’ and ‘how’ to ‘place-you’ or ‘how’-to ‘approach’-it, it’s kind of causing a bit of a ‘Experience’-in her
Jorn: yeah, well I ‘shut’-it, basically she can’t ‘get-in’ in any-point so, I recognize that ‘mechanism’ basically that’s present
Resonances: Ok, so allow her in to…
Jorn: yeah
Resonances: I mean, you can have so much fun, I mean really
Jorn: yeah, definitely and you know I want to change this point so I realize that ‘Defensive’-Mechanism that… like ‘bouncing’ it-off basically and that movement I…that you describe of ‘moving around-me’ I ‘see’ what you mean there
Resonances: why would you also do-that in terms-of uhm…’shutting’ ‘that’ point-out, because what Marlen represents is, she represents that ‘point’-of ‘Freedom of Expression’ and ‘Actual Living’ and, that ‘point’ you Can’t-‘Control’
Jorn: No
Resonances: And that is ‘also’ a form-of ‘Resistance’ because, your whole-‘Beingness’ is Manifested within ‘Control’
Jorn: yeah as a ‘Resistance’ basically
Resonances: so you’d ‘Resist’ that ‘Experience’ or ‘Expression’ of her in a way ‘Unconsciously’- it’s not ‘prominent’, but you’ll do it in the way you are ‘Physically-Moving’ uhm…so ‘Observe’…’Participate’ with-her, because in-that you will ‘Automatically’ start ‘Allowing’-yourself to ‘Express’ and ‘Live’- you gotta ‘let go’ of this point of wanting to ‘Control’ your world and reality – Now because ‘you know’ that you can’t ‘Control’ ‘Freedom of Expression’ in any-way whatsoever= you’ll go into-your ‘Mind-Reality’, ‘Allow’-Yourself to be ‘Possessed’ by your ‘Mind-Reality’- why? Because you know in your ‘Mind-Reality’ you can ‘fulfill’ that ‘Need’ for You to ‘Control’, does that make sense?
Jorn: it does
Resonances: therefore you’ll ‘retreat’
Jorn: the same ‘pattern’ or ‘construct’ is in my ‘Mind-Construct’ where I would Create an ‘outer-projection’ to ‘Direct’ basically my ‘thing’ and ‘feel good’ about-myself –so, I Recognize the whole-‘Construct’ that’s ‘Explained’-here
Resonances: So you’ve got a Real ‘gift’-here, ‘accept’-it, ‘embrace’-it and Allow-Yourself to ‘Live’
Jorn: Yes, thank you
Resonances: no, problem.